Romance and Autism: Dating is more than possible for people with ASD - Autism Awareness
I've written before about autism and dating from my own perspective. This time I asked my girlfriend to weigh in. It's not just things like driving and self-independence that take us a bit longer to achieve – the confidence to go out and start dating usually takes. Louis Scarantino offers dating tips for people with autism.
How Does a Person with Autism Date successfully?
Letting other people praise your accomplishments is much more attractive to girls and women than acting like you are your own biggest fan. Work on your manners. Girls tend to appreciate a guy who knows not to talk with his mouth full, how to stand back and let someone else enter a door first, and how to keep his voice volume low in a crowded movie theater.
Get a girl mentor, or several. I made friends with girls in my high school classes who I could ask questions about what girls expected or would like. An older sister or even your mom can be a great source of information. Find a girl with interests similar to yours.
Maybe you both excel in a class. Get to know a girl before you ask her out. Less pressure makes for a better first date. When you ask a girl on a date, make it specific.
If you wish, you can then wait a few days and ask her out again to a different event. One of the biggest mistakes guys make is talking too much about themselves or their interests. This is a special challenge for guys with Asperger Syndrome.
- How does a person with ASD date successfully?
- What dating an autistic man is like
When you talk with a girl, make your point and then give her a chance to respond. If she changes the subject, try and talk about the new subject for a while.
Dating Tips From a Man With Autism | The Mighty
Assume that a girl cares as much about her interests as you do yours and her opinions are just as valid. She is not less or more, she is different — in some interesting ways. People often talk about things to help them think them through, or just to have another person sympathize.
Pointing out what you see as a simple solution to her problem is not likely to earn you admiration for being smart. Girl-world has a lot of icebergs.
After that, though, you need to learn to listen to how your disability may negatively impact them — that is, to show the very empathy for others that you insist on receiving. That was more than four years ago. When my writing career began inI never dreamed that I would open up about being on the autism spectrum, much less delve into the vulnerable details of my personal life.
Starting on August 28,a new chapter began.
On that day, I entered a long-term relationship with my current girlfriend, Charlotte. It took me awhile to develop the nerve to ask her about what she has learned while dating an autistic man, with what is colloquially known as Asperger's Syndrome. Now it was my turn to ask her: What advice would she give to individuals who were thinking about long-term romantic relationships with people who are on the spectrum?
Romance and Autism: Dating is more than possible for people with ASD
The main thing she focused on was the difficulties that often arose in communication. Luckily I can tell when you are present vs.Autistic Dating Guide
There are also times when my struggles with empathy can be difficult for Charlotte.